Day 4 - Back to the Drawing board

The conundrum: what will we do with those flipping tiles? I want my shower back. But it can't be too expensive. And I don't want to do a patched job and have it look all wrong, it would bug me every time I hop in the shower. And that is at least once every day. 
We can't get a tile that matches the current monstrosities that so desperately want to be in the category that calls themselves a tile.
We can't get a tile that will clash with the other tiles on the wall.
We can't get a tile with the wrong shape, size or depth.
We can't get a tile.
What the hell are we supposed to do, without ripping down all the old tiles and replacing them all with gold-plated, marble-clad specimens? The children's college fund is at serious risk!

So I call John.
What do you think we should do, John?
I don't know, it's up to you.
Up to me? Why the hell is it up to me, John? Don't you live here? Don't you shower here? Don't you spend as long in the bathroom as your average teenage Twilight follower?
Well, look, you're much better at these things than I am...
Am I???
Well, you are, you are much better at matching colours and things like that...
This is about more than colours, John!!!
Why don't you just try and find a tile that matches, you know, approximately?
HAVE YOU HEARD A THING I HAVE BEEN SAYING, JOHN???
It's hopeless. I will sort it. He knows I will. I know I will. Why did I even bother ringing him, my humour is more foul than it was 10 minutes ago.
OK. Deep breath.

I call Rory. He agrees with me.
If only all men were this agreeable!
We won't be able to match the tiles. We won't even get close. And even if we do, there will still be a colour discrepancy. It will look gank. We will have to rip down all the tiles but we will find a cheap plain tile to replace them, it is only a shower enclosure after all. If we pick up one of the colours that is in the rest of the bathroom, and make sure there is nothing else going on (no singing, dancing, thrice embossed, magic tile that is a portal to another parallel universe) then we will be fine.
We will need ten square yards now. Not eight. But if we find a reasonsable tile it won't be expensive.
I hang up the phone and feel much better. Rory rocks. The way I am feeling right now I would rather he shared my (!) bathroom...

We had fish fingers for the second day in a row today. It's the stuff with Omega 3 and I threw in not one but two vegetables (baked beans count, don't they?). Tomorrow I will cook a proper dinner. I will!

With all this stuff going on, how am I ever going to find a job?